August 24, 2011

The Post In Which I Hyperlink 'Unitard'

For two years, I schlepped the 50 foot garden hose around the back yard when I needed to water plants.  And when I was done watering, I would - like a Mexican Wrestler (you are definitely going to want to click on that hyperlink)- put on my cape, mask, and unitard, bare my teeth, crouch down with my hands out, and SPRING into attack mode, contorting my opponent (the hose) and wrangling it into submission.  I received bonus points if the hose ended up in something resembling a 'heap' or 'pile'.

This 50 foot of hose pile/heap would then sit on the back porch floor, taking up about 20 square feet (my wrangling skills are limited), making the back porch very 'GO AWAY-y'.

NO MORE!

Dear reader, I bring you, the HOSE PUT-ER AWAY-ER!
Oh happy day.

15 comments:

  1. I'm gonna trust you on the wrestler reference. I really don't think my eyes can take it right now! LOL But congrats on the hose put-ter away-er!!!

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  2. I got tired of schlepping too, so i came up with my own fix. i ran pvc tubing of a diameter only slightly larger than the garden hose, through a hole in the foundation, under the house, from back to front. i hooked up a y diverter thingy to my one outdoor faucet, so I have one hose for the front yard (thru the piping) and one hose for the backyard. {I so totally did not explain that well.} my builder dude looked at it, looked at me, scratched his head and walked away without a word. i took it as approval.

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  3. You should have said hose and unitard on twitter! I need a hose putter-awayer!

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  4. Nice. El DIY-o Diablo de Holyoke

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  5. hhahahaa love this post :) enjoy your... Thing

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  6. Fancy! But i think your hose put-er-away-er thing needs a more Lucha libre style name. You know...like El Agua Elgurario

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  7. Hi Sweetie, loved your description of hose attack mode (being afflicted with the same hose-versus-human problem), however I don't even want to know how you got to the Mexican Wrestler costume! love, mom

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  8. Haha! We have a similar hose wrangler and it makes SUCH a difference!

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  9. Ah, it's the little things . . . but if only you could instead have hired a costumed mexican wrestler to schlep your hose for you? That would have been fun too.

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  10. lol... I HATE having to wrangle garden hoses! It makes my blood pressure skyrocket.

    We finally got a hose put-er away-er a couple months ago too. But ours is just one of the ones that sits on the ground -- your wall-mount version is very nice! These things are wonderful.

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  11. The hose wrangling description is brilliant! I deal with 150ft of hose, 365 days a year, to bring water to my horses. I long for underground piping to the barn and paddocks! I avoid hose wrangling during the warm half of the year, in favor of the leave-it-where-it-lies-and-shift-it-an-inch-every-few-days-so-it-doesn't-make-a-strip-in-the-grass method. Winter, no such luck. Winter, joyous time, I have to disconnect it at the faucet when done and walk the length of it, (over two fences, mind you) lifting it as I go to drain it so that it doesn't freeze and can be used the next day. And if I don't drain it well enough, it means 150ft of garden hose wrangled into a coil as you described, and carried indoors to thaw in the tiny shower in the bathroom of my studio apartment. Good times!

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  12. I never laughed so hard, I can totally relate!!!! We have become so lazy that 50 feet is by the house in a pile and 50 feet is still in a heap in the back 40. I'm seeing soak-er hoses and a pump for the rain barrels in the future.

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  13. DarcC! Seriously?!?! I know what you're getting for Christmas, a Lucha Libre costume!

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  14. FrenchLogic - AWESOME STORY! I love it. Well done. Every time a handy person shakes their head in disbelief, an angel gets its wings.

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  15. Ah HA! Oh Happy Day indeed!

    p.s. the Mexican Wrestler pic made me think of that movie (oh WHAT is the name? I can't think of it!) with Jack Black. I love him. He cracks me up! So do YOU, by the way!

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